A man suffered a serious heart attack while shopping in a store. The store clerks called an ambulance when they saw him collapse to the floor.
The paramedics rushed the man to the nearest hospital where he had emergency, open-heart, bypass surgery. He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at the Catholic hospital. A nun was seated next to his bed holding a clipboard loaded with several forms and a pen. She asked him how he was going to pay for his treatment. "Do you have health insurance?" she asked.
He replied in a raspy voice, "No health insurance."
The nun asked, "Do you have money in the bank?"
He replied, "No money in the bank."
Do you have a relative who could help you with the payments?" asked the irritated nun.
He said, "I only have a spinster sister, and she is a nun."
The nun became agitated and announced loudly, "Nuns are not spinsters! Nuns are married to God."
The patient replied, "Perfect!!! Send the bill to my brother-in-law."
Beer Nuts: $1.49
Deer nuts: Still under a buck.
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